I’m 21.
The world is my oyster
And I plan to suck every bit of it dry.

When will this grandiosity end?

nevver:

Bookmark

And all I can think about is meeting up in the ladies room for random sex with the hot guy sitting in the study cubby next to me.

-Cash
-Perfume (something on the more musky side)
-Bottle(s) of kraken rum, or belvedere vodka
-Sushi dinner dates
-Back massages
-Fine coffee, tea or chocolate
-10 free cab rides
-Panera bread gift cards
-RayBan sunglasses, preferably wayfarer
-Vouchers for free stays at any Wynn-owned hotel in Vegas
-A baby Siberian tiger

That should cover it.

Is comparable to eating a meal cooked by Gordon Ramsy.

My name is jenni, I will be 21 in 28 days. I will be attending cal state long beach in the fall as an English rhetoric major, and I have just been promoted from host to server at my job. Are you impressed? Well, I am, and you should be too.

so you can’t spend the night at your secret booty call’s house because you have work in the morning and mommy dearest would like for you to be at home. i guess that’s what you get for being 20 years old and still living with your parents!

alexsegura:

Beautiful Celebrity Illustrations and Pop Culture Collages (via @flavorpill)